Did you know that the reason the team fanned 1,482 times last year - the sixth most in baseball - was the failed batting coach, Marcus Thames?
Yep. It was Thames' fault. And this new guy has created ripples in the Yankee Matrix with a stunning new philosophy: "Hit strikes hard." (Edit note: See comments.)
Yep. That's it. "Hit strikes hard." This goes directly into the teeth of Thames' flawed philosophy, which was: "Miss strikes hard."
This is big, a sea change. Instead of missing strikes, the Yankees will seek to hit them. Hard.
Wow... I mean... WOW! Calgon Beauty Bath, take me away!
Insert sigh here.
You know, while the players and owners dig their mutual grave, it's becoming difficult just to mock these assholes anymore. They transcend parody, even in a burlesque sort of way. And seriously... let's wish Lawson good luck. Here is his Wikipedia thumbnail, and I want to stress that this is real, not bad satire.
Dillon Lawson is an American professional baseball hitting coach for the New York Yankees of Major League Baseball, beginning in 2022.
Lawson attended Transylvania University, where he played college baseball as a catcher and first baseman.[1] After graduating, he became a coach at Lindenwood University from 2007 to 2009, IMG Academy from 2010 through 2011, and Morehead State University from 2009 through 2012, and Southeast Missouri State University from 2012 through 2015.[2] In 2016, Lawson was the hitting coach for the Tri-City ValleyCats, and in 2017 he coached for the University of Missouri.[3] In 2018, he coached for the Quad Cities River Bandits.[1]
Yep. Transylvania... Lindenwood... IMG... Morehead State... Southeast Missouri State... the Tri-City ValleyCats... the Quad Cities River Bandits... and the New York fucking Yankees. He's a 1980's Dolly Parton movie. But now he'll face the ultimate ceiling, the huge existential question:
When did multimillionaire sluggers ever listen to batting coaches?
Will Joey Gallo change? Will Luke Voit - (yeah, he'll probably be 1B again) - start hitting to the opposite field, as he did as a rookie? We know the answers: No frickin' way. They made it this far, earned a shitload of money, and they won't alter their swing for this year's organizational chum.
I think the Yankees should hire a Defensive Coordinator to call each pitch, and an Offensive Coordinator to handle at-bat strategy. Aaron Boone should simply hold a clipboard and yell things like, "LET'S GET TWO!" We need an Outfield Coach, an Infield Coach, a Catcher Coach and at least four pitching coaches, depending on spin rates, mph and BABIPs. Maybe an Exit Velo Coach?
Surely, we'll see an offensive surge in 2022. What were thinking with that old strategy, "Miss strikes hard?" Yeesh. I'm glad we straightened it out.